Ten Ways to Manage Your Finances and Avoid Post-Holiday Regrets by Eric Tyson, author of Personal Finance for Dummies, 6^th Edition (Wiley, ISBN: 978-0-470-50693-6, $21.99)

The holidays are upon us, bringing all those personal and family images and sensations we cherish. But for many of us, there are a few not-so-joyous holiday sights (a purse overflowing with credit card receipts) and sounds (the ca-ching! of the cash registers marking our escalating debt). These negatives can easily outweigh all that we love about the holiday season, especially during this less-than-prosperous economic period.

Overall, the recession has brought about a renewed dedication to saving. Before the recession, our national personal savings rate was close to zero, and now it’s around 4 percent. But it is very important that you not let your holiday spending zap all of the saving progress you made during the year.

Whether it’s a dedication to the gift-giving tradition, a sense of obligation, or a feeling that the holidays entitle us to have a little more fun than usual, too many of us seem to turn a blind eye to the budget-busting reality of all that spending over just a couple of months. Don’t let excessive holiday spending cause any unnecessary financial stress for you and your family.

What if you could have a wonderful, memorable holiday and avoid the financial hangover afterwards? Here are some great tips on how to keep your holiday spending in check.

Find an alternative to gift-giving during the holidays. Many people feel they have to give gifts during the holidays, either because it’s a family tradition or because they know their friends and relatives have gotten gifts for them. There are plenty of great ways to trade in this tradition for another one that is even more meaningful, and chances are your family and friends will be happy to save gift-buying dough as well.

Instead of exchanging gifts, your family members might want to pool their money and spend it on a holiday outing. If you have kids, you’ll probably want to get them a little something, but set strict spending limits. Instead of piling up the toys, let each child choose an outing or event that he or she gets to spend with you one-on-one. Kids will look back on the valuable time you’ve spent together a lot more fondly than they will any toy or video game they use a couple of times and then toss aside.

If you must buy gifts, cut your expenses elsewhere as necessary. Perhaps you’d rather dine out or go to the movies less, or maybe you can forego that new pair of shoes you’ve been wanting for yourself in order to afford gifts for the grandparents. It doesn’t matter where you make cuts, just that you make them. Keeping your other spending under control while you’re out there doing your shopping can be a challenge, but just keep repeating to yourself the importance of not over-spending. That way when it comes time to actually pass out those presents you’ve purchased, you can do it without grimacing as you think about the damage they did to your bank account.

Set a budget and keep tabs on what you are spending. While you’re doing your holiday shopping, your new best friends should be your checkbook register, credit card statements, and all of your receipts. It’s easy to get into a spending rhythm when shopping for yourself or others, and that’s why you need to physically write down every purchase you make and make sure you don’t go over your budget. When you start to add up everything you’re spending, you may be shocked at what all those expenses from this store and that store add up to be. And don’t forget about all those ‘necessary’ holiday extras. Most people don’t budget their shopping and don’t realize that by the time you buy all the presents, plus wrapping paper, cards, decorations, etc., it’s added up to a ridiculous amount. Having a budget that you know you must stick to will help keep your impulse spending from getting out of hand and will help you hone in on the most reasonably priced holiday items.

Plan what you are going to buy, and don’t get any extras! Particularly during the holidays, companies pull out their most appealing packaging in hopes of snagging the eyes of shoppers. That’s why along with your budget, you’re going to want to take an exact list of what you want to buy for your gift recipients. Don’t go shopping for someone’s gift until you know exactly what you are going to buy.

It’s very easy to go in with no plan, see something you like, and get it simply because you have no idea what else to get for a hard-to-buy-for relative despite the gift’s significant price tag. Another temptation that the list will help you squelch is the desire to buy those little knickknacks here and there that you think will make nice small additions to the gifts you’ve purchased. Very rarely are things like this necessary, and if you’ve got your list in hand, it will be easier for you to pass them by without hesitation.

Use the season to set a good example for your kids. Your kids learn about money from you. And if they see you spending left and right during the holiday season, the lesson they come away with isn’t going to be a good one. During the holidays, it’s very easy for the “gimmee gimmee gimmee” materialistic attitude to get out of control. After all, kids are bombarded with constant advertisements for toys, clothes, and the latest gadgets you can be guaranteed they’ll want (or at least think they do!).

There’s plenty you can do to help kids appreciate the true meaning of the holidays. Have them give some of their money to a local charity, participate in a program in which they buy and wrap gifts for underprivileged kids, or volunteer at a soup kitchen. It can be an eye-opening experience for kids to see that not everyone has enough money to have an enjoyable holiday.

Watch out for deals that seem too good to be true. Retailers run all sorts of specials to induce consumers to buy now, and the holidays offer these companies easy prey in the form of deal-seeking, cash-strapped consumers. For example, furniture stores frequently offer that if you buy now, you don’t have to pay a thing for a year, and you might even get free delivery. This sort of “push” marketing can make it harder for you to say no.

This is just one example of how stores coax in shoppers. Always remember that free financing for, say, a year is not a huge cost to the dealer, but it is a cost, and if you forgo it, you should be able to negotiate a lower purchase price. Retailers find that buyers are less likely to negotiate the price if they are getting a short-term financing break. Read the fine print on any deal you are considering taking before you go to the store to make the purchase. It can be even harder to say no once you get to the store, so you’ll want to know what you are in for before you get there.

Leave the plastic at home. Many of us can explain away spending so much on gifts because we simply charge everything and reason that we can pay it off gradually after the holidays. This is a great way to create a never-ending cycle of consumer debt for yourself. It only creates unnecessary financial stress for you after the holidays.

Use your budget to figure out how you can purchase the gifts you want to purchase without putting them on your credit card. If you are so cash-strapped that you think it will be difficult to avoid charging gifts, then you may want to sit down with other friends and family and propose a limit on how much gifts can cost this year—or propose no adult gift exchanges at all. Far from being disappointed, it’s likely they’ll view this reprieve from gift-buying as a gift in its own right.

Invest in your kids’ financial futures. It may not seem as exciting to your kids as a new iPod, but a contribution to their financial well-being will be appreciated long after such expensive “toys” are obsolete. Have the grandparents contribute to a college tuition fund or savings account rather than buy them more stuff they don’t need. Or make one of your gifts to your kids a stock fund portfolio that can start accruing now. Also, make them aware of the budgets and tools you are using to keep your spending in check. The holidays are a great time for them to truly learn that money doesn’t grow on trees.

Give the gift of time to your kids. Often, parents buy gifts for their kids with the best of intentions. Either you don’t want to deprive them of the toys and gadgets all of their friends have, or you want to give them the things you didn’t have as a kid.

Both of these tendencies are perfectly understandable, but I’ve found that parents who buy too much for their kids often have difficulty changing the habit. The holiday season offers great opportunities for you to show your kids how much you love and care for them. For example, you can make time with them each week to watch a holiday film or TV show, go on a walk to see your neighbors’ holiday lights and decorations, or emphasize that giving back message again and take them caroling at a local retirement home. All of these activities cost next to nothing, and they will be fun for the kids and for you!

Remember that meaningful gifts don’t necessarily have a big price tag. Sure, it might be nice to give your mom a brand new TV, but there are other things out there that will be even more meaningful and enjoyable for her—like a photo album with candid shots of the grandkids or something they’ve made for her themselves. If you are looking to give a gift that truly means something and that will keep its value for years to come, you are better off looking for nonmaterial gifts to give than for something your gift recipients could get themselves at the local big box store.

Money can easily become the focus of the holidays when it should be the last thing you are thinking about. By keeping your spending under control, you can have a great holiday and avoid the sick feeling in the pit of your stomach that occurs when you start getting those credit card bills in the mail. If you prepare properly, you can achieve a happy balance of spending and saving during the holiday season. That’s a great gift in and of itself, for both you and the people you love.

Personal Finance for Dummies, 6^th Edition available at Amazon.com

Visit Eric Tyson online at erictyson.com

Dear Heather,

I feel like I should be spending less money now due to all the hub-bub about the economic “crisis”, but everything I know about the law of attraction tells me that to get it to flow, I’ve got to be spending – like attracts like!

J.G.

Dear J.G.,

This is such a phenomenal question – thank you for sending it in. It seems like everywhere we turn, there’s bad news – the sky is falling, the sky is falling! People are constricting their wallets and businesses are responding in kind. It then becomes a vicious cycle with everyone blaming everyone else for the alleged mess. However, what really matters is not who’s to blame, but how we can each take personal responsibility for our economic standing and choose differently.

Should’s tend to position us as the victim of what someone else is doing. Someone else thinks we should be thinner, we should spend less money, we should parent our children better, we should be fearful about the economy, etc.

Should’s completely disempower us! They take away our natural ability to choose what is best for ourselves (because we are, in fact, the only ones who know what is best for us) and instead places them in the hands of society, our culture at large, or our friends and family.

So, J.G., do YOU think you need to spend less money? Try this:

-Go to your favorite room in your house.

-Sit in a comfortable position.

-Close your eyes.

-Breathe deeply through your belly, in and out.

-Ask yourself: Do I really need to spend less money?

-Listen for a response.

-Observe the way your body responds to it

-Does it feel good or does it feel bad?

-If it feels bad, try focusing in on what would make you feel good.

-Honor that.

About Heather Strang:

Heather Strang is a writer and success coach passionate about conscious living. Her writing has appeared in national blogs, books and a host of print and online publications including The Twenty-Something Manifesto, Women’s eNews, NicoleWilliams.com, Amaze magazine, White Apricot, The Oregonian, Portland Tribune, NW Women’s Journal and many others. She also writes the highly visible Eat Wheat-Free, Dairy-Free and Low Sugar blog for women seeking healthy food alternatives. When she’s not writing, you’ll find Heather meditating on the beach, creating new recipes and exploring the possibilities of the universe.

Heather Strang, and co-author Brooke Emery, wrote the upcoming book Stop Shoulding On Yourself! A Woman’s Guide From Obligation to Inspiration. The book encourages women to live from an authentic and should-free space.

Dear J.G.,

This is such a phenomenal question – thank you for sending it in. It seems like everywhere we turn, there’s bad news – the sky is falling, the sky is falling! People are constricting their wallets and businesses are responding in kind. It then becomes a vicious cycle with everyone blaming everyone else for the alleged mess. However, what really matters is not who’s to blame, but how we can each take personal responsibility for our economic standing and choose differently.

Should’s tend to position us as the victim of what someone else is doing. Someone else thinks we should be thinner, we should spend less money, we should parent our children better, we should be fearful about the economy, etc.

Should’s completely disempower us! They take away our natural ability to choose what is best for ourselves (because we are, in fact, the only ones who know what is best for us) and instead places them in the hands of society, our culture at large, or our friends and family.

So, J.G., do YOU think you need to spend less money? Try this:

-Go to your favorite room in your house.
-Sit in a comfortable position.
-Close your eyes.
-Breathe deeply through your belly, in and out.
-Ask yourself: Do I really need to spend less money?
-Listen for a response.
-Observe the way your body responds to it
-Does it feel good or does it feel bad?
-If it feels bad, try focusing in on what would make you feel good.
-Honor that.

Heather Strang, and co-author Brooke Emery, wrote the upcoming book Stop Shoulding On Yourself! A Woman’s Guide From Obligation to Inspiration. The book encourages women to live from an authentic and should-free space.

L.B

Dear L.B.,

Those “guru’s” sure do hand out a lot of should’s don’t they? The financial should’s can get pretty complicated with all the rules about what you should and shouldn’t do. What is important, L.B. is that you feel that the choices you make regarding your financial situation are based on what feels right for you. And if you don’t feel like you know what’s right for you, you can reach out to resources you feel drawn to and that will allow you to make the most authentic decisions.

For you, that could mean connecting with a financial advisor who could educate you on a specific area around money and abundance. Or you could pick up books on financial management–ones you feel drawn to, of course–that will allow you to decide if you need to have 6 months worth of cash stashed away, in addition to paying off all your debt.

It’s simply essential that you follow what feels best for you–whether it’s reaching out to advisors or connecting with other resources like books, workshops and classes.

In addition, I highly recommend the following ladies in the area of money. They look at money from an abundance perspective and teach you how to make choices that resonate the most deeply with you:

-Lynne Twist, The Soul of Money Institute www.soulofmoney.org
-Chellie Campbell, The Wealthy Spirit & Zero to Zillionaire www.chellie.com

Another important aspect of living a should-free life is embracing the abundance that you already possess. There’s no need to buy into the fear about rough economic times or the belief that you must/do live “pay check to pay check”. While on the outside these may feel like stark realities, in truth, our beliefs about our economic standing will create our external reality. So, why not choose rich, good-feeling thoughts?! Here are some tips for claiming your truest, most abundant life:

-Create an abundance affirmation (The Wealthy Spirit by Chellie Campbell is chock full of these). Make sure it’s something that feels good to you. Examples:

“I am surrounded by total abundance. When I spend money, immediately more comes rushing back to me. My bank account and investments are overflowing with good fortune.” 

“I always have an abundance of money in my life. I buy whatever I need, with plenty leftover for savings and fun.”

-Honor the abundance mentality by bringing it into your home or office with feng shui. (http://10kblessingsfengshui.com/) The top left corner of your desk is your prosperity center, so place a plant there along with anything else that symbolizes abundance to you (for me it’s a laughing, fat Buddha and a red envelope with my intentions/affirmations of abundance).

-Create intentions about the amount of abundance you want in your life. Be sure to state these only in the positive. Intend how much money you’ll make next month, next year and 5 years from now. Intend the balances of your savings and investment accounts. Intend the vacations you’ll take each year (and go ahead and include the 5-star hotel you’ll stay at). Have fun with this and don’t self-edit. The sky is the limit!

-Watch what you say when talking with others about the economy or your own financial situation. Eliminate words from your vocabulary such as “pay check to pay check”, “economic downturn”, “debt”, etc. When you talk about money or what you will spend money on, speak about it only in the positive. Instead of saying, “I can’t afford that”, say, “I’m choosing to spend my money on other things right now” (this is actual truth, after all!).

Utilizing some of these simple tips into your life can help transform your experience with money into a more positive, abundant one. Before you know it, you won’t have to worry about whether to save 6 months worth of cash or pay off your balances–it will all be done!

Wishing you much continued abundance and joy,
Heather

Have a question about this topic or any other? Next month we’ll focus on the should’s surrounding your HEALTH. Send your questions to:  heather@heatherstrang.com.

Hi Heather,

S.H.

Dear S.H,

Congratulations on nearing the completion of your college degree! That’s a definite cause for celebration. However, I can understand why it may be hard to celebrate when a dark cloud of impending financial doom is following you around.

Consistently worrying about your student loan debt uses up a tremendous amount of your mental space and energy. In addition, fear keeps you from fully enjoying your life experiences today – in the way of Internet, cable, vacations, dinners out, etc.

When it comes to money, perception is everything. My co-author for Stop Shoulding On Yourself! Brooke Emery, (link to: www.attractionboutique.com) is a life coach and recently shared an experience she had surrounding the issue of money and perception. One of her clients is very successful and has sold hundreds of thousands of books. He started off a recent conversation with her by saying, “I should be rich…” And guess what? By anyone’s standards, he is a wealthy man.

What does this example show us? Money (as in life) is all about perception. You could have millions of dollars and still feel poor – if that’s your perception.

Today is all you or I will ever “have.” Nothing more, nothing less. If tomorrow was your last day, would you be concerned about student loans? Probably not. Instead, you’d think about your family, friends, places you traveled, people you met in college, your favorite professor, or maybe even that juicy cheeseburger you devoured. Debt would be irrelevant.

If you can move into appreciating and enjoying life now, you’ll have less space to worry about “30G’s.” Shift your perception and it will change your life!

To shift from financial worry to enjoying life in this moment, try some of these tips:

• Sit quietly for 5 minutes every day. Do not think, ruminate or worry.
• Engage in one activity a week that you LOVE. This can be as simple as dancing in your living room or treating yourself to your favorite meal.
• Plan a night out to celebrate being one-year away from graduation. Plan an even bigger shin-dig for next year when you graduate. Thank the university, your professors and the student loan system. Feel gratitude for the experience.
• Indulge in one luxury a month. It can be a massage, Internet access at home, Netflix – whatever feels indulgent to you.
• Consider the possibility of simply making just your regular student loan payment, instead of three times the amount. When you write out the check, make it into a ritual – one of celebration and thanks for having the opportunity to receive an amazing education.
• Spend some time uncovering why debt sends you into a tailspin. Is it connected to your childhood? Do you judge others who carry debt? A great coach or counselor can help you explore these issues.

Much love & blessings,
Heather

Have a question about this topic or any other? Next month we’ll focus on the should’s surrounding relationships and sex (fun, fun!). Send your questions to: heather@heatherstrang.com

The polar ice caps are melting, species are facing extinction and our climate has become more erratic than ever before.  It is impossible to deny the need for intense change in the face of today’s gathering ecological crises.  Now that scientific facts support the theories behind global warming, why aren’t more people paying attention—and how do we stop the damage?

Jonathon Porritt, adviser to the UK Prime Minister and author of the new book, “Capitalism as if the World Matters,” (Earthscan 2007) says the first step towards implementing change is to alter the approach to conventional environmentalism. To win people over and get them on board, he suggests focusing on the positive.  “Change will not come by threatening people with yet more ecological doom and gloom,” says Porritt.  “The necessary changes have to be seen as good for people, their health and their quality of life – and not just good for future generations.”

As the book title suggests, the biggest players in the game- businesses and politicians- must undergo a paradigm shift. “Anything vaguely resembling ‘business-as-usual’ is no less than a death warrant for the highest ideals of contemporary civilization,” says Porritt.  “And that means we have to dig a lot deeper than today’s superficial, febrile political debates seem inclined to do.”

While Porritt acknowledges the big picture can be very threatening, he believes positive and profound change is possible.  Through his work with Forum for the Future, an organization that works with a very wide range of some of the world’s biggest international companies, Porritt acts as an adviser to a number of chief executives.  Porritt says the message that capitalism can be a change-agent for our future is starting to resonate.  “Like it or not (and the vast majority of people do), capitalism is now the only economic game in town,” says Porritt.  “And that, of course, means that the emerging solutions have to be fashioned with the embrace of capitalism.”

Porritt suggests that today’s model of capitalism is more and more dependent upon liquidating our necessary natural resources.  This in turn has a ripple effect of magnifying divides between the rich and the poor worldwide.

Porritt suggests that there are three ways we can transform capitalism in order to stop this from getting worse:

• Pay real prices for the things that we take out of nature
• Get the balance right between the short and long term
• Promote responsible consumption (energy, food, travel, etc)

“This combination is the most likely to provide a serious political alternative to today’s economic and political beliefs,” say Porritt.  “Sustainable growth is understood as answering the inescapable challenge of living within our “natural limits,” providing unique opportunities for responsible and innovative capital creators, and offering people a more equitable and more rewarding way of life.”

“Capitalism as if the World Matters” offers real-world solutions to the ‘destruction of the world’ problems that our global society faces. Porritt has put his experience to work, outlining frameworks for sustainable capitalism and pointing to the initiatives some governments and businesses are already beginning to follow.  As Porritt so adroitly points out, unless conventional environmentalism throws its weight behind this type of progressive political agenda, the planet will continue to face steep decline.